- The Gemara in Kesuvos 28b discusses a situation in which members of a family are not conducting themselves properly, the other members initiate a procedure in which they distance themselves from the wrongdoers, so that they shouldn’t be collectively tainted. They declare that this should be a "דוגמא לדורות" “a token for generations”.
- We feel that we are in a similar situation, people in the future will wonder, how is it possible that such a respected and noble family would stoop so low? Answers will be impossible to find, already there are so many lies and distortions which are thrown around with abandon, and we do not want to be tainted. We want to be able to say "ידינו לא שפכו את הדם הזה", we were and are willing to end this madness, but we can’t control other people’s decisions.
- We are therefore establishing this website as a “token for generations”. Clearly stating the principles with which we conducted ourselves, and will continue to do so, and the efforts that we made to end this madness.
THE ROOT
#1 We will follow our parents expressed wishes (especially one that was reiterated more than once), and this will be done even if this offends some of the children, or hurts their feelings.
#2 We will safeguard our parents life and wellbeing against anything or anyone that threatens it, again, even if this offends some of the children, or hurts their feelings.
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THE TACTICS
#3 Acknowledging that knowingly and willingly causing a parent tzaar and aggravation is of the most serious crimes (akin to:
מכה אביו ואמו, מקלל אביו ואמו, מקלה אביו ואמו), we therefore commit to refraining ח"ו from doing so, even if we feel we have a legitimate gripe.
#4 Committing to care and provide comfort, in the maximum way, for our aging and debilitated parents, without preconditions or excuses, as difficult as it may be.
#5 Acknowledging it is the 'רצון ד that the family be in harmony, which besides many things includes, when one member in the family has an issue with another, that they will engage in dialogue, and try to resolve it in a peaceful way.
#6 Acknowledging that although people do not have a right to their own reality, they do have a right to their own opinion, and they will not be vilified for it, and certainly the people associated with them will not be vilified.
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THE SUMMARY
#7 Parties trying to overturn principles #1 & #2, and using as their leverage: the overturning of principles #3 through #6, or other asymmetrical tactics, will not be paid any attention, and their efforts will fall flat, because we will stand firm and uphold the aforementioned principles.
#8 After all that has transpired, and all the atrocities that have been done, we are willing to consider moving forward, and let bygones be bygones, (providing Ta is מוחל all those who hurt him בלב שלם), with all those that are willing to uphold these aforementioned principles. And as a historical context demonstrating the consistency of our position, we will attach 2 emails: (you can click on them) 9/22/23 and 9/28/23 that were sent to the family, but were sadly rebuffed.